Joke thread 2021

[Dion]

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[Kevin Birch]

Cheese is the answer to all our problems, it will make Britain grate again.

[RockyUSA]

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[Mark1Stu]

“Ah, so that smaller number is the engine number, right?”

“Er, no Sir, that’s the cars current market value”

[Grant]

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[Grant]

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[Grant]

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[Grant]

A pensioner drove his brand new BMW to 100 mph, looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a police car behind him. He floored it to 140 , then 150, ... then 155, ... Suddenly he thought,
"I'm too old for this nonsense !"
So he pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the police car to catch up with him.
The officer walked up to him, looked at his watch and said,
"Sir, my shift ends in ten minutes. Today is Friday and I'm taking off for the weekend with my family. If you can give me a good reason that I've never heard before, why you were speeding... I'll let you go."
The Man looked very seriously at the police man, and replied :-
"Years ago, my wife ran off with a policeman, I thought you were bringing her back." !!!
The Cop left saying,
" Have a good day, Sir "...

[AH1951]

Another child bride!
.

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[Dion]

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[Richie]

.

[VFK44]

That's brilliant!

Of course, Hagerty do run a Festival of the Unexceptional:

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[sandro botticelli]

On a lighter note also from those dark days of 1943 is this letter from the British Embassy in Moscow:

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[VFK44]

According to a plaque proudly displayed under the bonnet, my Fiat was built in Turkey by a company called Koc Holding.

[sandro botticelli]

Enamelled onto the heating controls of every DaImler Dart dashboard is the instruction:

PULL KNOB FOR BLOWER