joke thread

[RAP72]

[AH1951]

Steve,
The joke is that the private car, a target of politicians and environmentalists everywhere, is the safest form of travel if you want to prevent getting coronavirus. You're isolated in your own climate-controlled private tin box.

The joke with the London pollution issue is, "Hey, wait a minute, you can't expect a huge drop in road traffic to make any difference. Just look at all these other forms of pollution."

[RAP72]

Steve,
The joke is that the private car, a target of politicians and environmentalists everywhere, is the safest form of travel if you want to prevent getting coronavirus. You're isolated in your own climate-controlled private tin box.

The joke with the London pollution issue is, "Hey, wait a minute, you can't expect a huge drop in road traffic to make any difference. Just look at all these other forms of pollution."

Sorry still don't get it! perhaps it is just me.

[colin7673]

Steve,
The joke is that the private car, a target of politicians and environmentalists everywhere, is the safest form of travel if you want to prevent getting coronavirus. You're isolated in your own climate-controlled private tin box.

The joke with the London pollution issue is, "Hey, wait a minute, you can't expect a huge drop in road traffic to make any difference. Just look at all these other forms of pollution."

Sorry still don't get it! perhaps it is just me.

No Steve, your not alone

[AH1951]

I think it's hilarious.

[Pymmie]

Is this anyone on here ?

John P

[witkowski]

* Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.

* I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.

* I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

* Still haven't decided where to go for Easter ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom

* PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

* Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

* I don't think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we'd go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

* This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog..... we laughed a lot.

* So, after this quarantine.....will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?
* Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.
* My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

* Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

* I'm so excited --- it's time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

* I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I'm getting tired of Los Livingroom.

* Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

* Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said "I hope I don't have the same teacher next year".... I'm offended.

* Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under

[RAP72]

[RAP72]

,

[Dion]

[witkowski]

A plane with 5 passengers on board -- Donald Trump, Boris Johnson, Angela Merkel, the Pope and a 10-year-old schoolgirl -- is about to crash and there are only 4 parachutes. Trump says " I need one. I am the smartest man in the US and I need to solve the pandemic!" He takes one parachute and jumps. Johnson says ' I'm needed to solve the COVID-19 mess in Britain '. He grabs one and jumps. The Pope says: " The Catholics of the world depend on me for comfort in a time of fear." He takes one and jumps. " You can have the last parachute," says Merkel to the 10-year-old. " I've lived my life. Yours is just starting." The little girl replies: " Don't worry, there are 2 parachutes left, the smartest man in the US just jumped with my school bag."

[RockyUSA]

What’s old is new!

My grandfather told me that joke in about ‘72.... only replace Trump with Henry Kissinger.

There were other sundry character differences, and it was a Boy Scout!

Still, amusing....

[AH1951]

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[Dion]

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[VFK44]

Well, at least that joke isn't pointless.